Helping Kids Navigate Big Emotions: Understanding Childhood Anxiety and When to Seek Support

Helping Kids Navigate Big Emotions: Understanding Childhood Anxiety and When to Seek Support

February is a month centered around love, making it a perfect time to explore how we can help children navigate their big emotions with care and understanding. Love is not just about affection; it is also about providing children with the tools they need to manage their feelings in a healthy way. One of the most common challenges young children face is anxiety, though it often looks different from the anxiety we see in adults. Understanding how anxiety presents in children, as well as when to seek extra support, can make all the difference in helping little ones feel safe and secure in their world.

What Does Childhood Anxiety Look Like?

It is natural for children to experience fear and worry from time to time. However, anxiety becomes a concern when these feelings are persistent, intense, and begin to interfere with daily life. Unlike adults, who can often verbalize their anxiety, young children may express it in different ways, including:

For example, a child who used to love going to birthday parties may suddenly refuse toattend, crying and clinging to their parents. Another child may complain of a stomachache every morning before school, even though there is no physical illness present These behaviors can indicate underlying anxiety that needs attention.

Helping Kids Manage Big Emotions

As parents and caregivers, we want to see our children thrive emotionally. There are several ways we can support them in navigating their feelings:

1. Validate Their Feelings

Children need to know that their emotions are valid, even if they seem excessive to adults. Instead of saying, "There's nothing to be afraid of," try saying, "I can see that you're feeling scared. It's okay to feel that way. Let's talk about it." Acknowledging their fear helps them feel heard and understood.

For instance, if a child is afraid of the dark, rather than dismissing their fear, you can say, "I understand that the dark feels scary to you. Let’s find a way to make you feel safer, like using a nightlight or listening to calming music."

2. Teach Emotional Language

Young children may struggle to name their feelings, which can make them seem out of control. Helping them put words to their emotions—such as "I'm feeling nervous about trying something new"—can reduce frustration and empower them to express their needs more effectively.

A helpful activity is using a "feelings chart" with pictures of different emotions, allowing children to point to the face that best represents how they feel. This gives them tangible way to express emotions that they may not yet have the words for.

3. Model Healthy Coping Skills

Children learn by watching the adults around them. If they see you managing stress in a calm and positive way, they will be more likely to adopt those same strategies. Demonstrate deep breathing, positive self-talk, or taking breaks when overwhelmed.

For example, if you're feeling frustrated while stuck in traffic, you can verbalize your coping strategy: "I’m feeling a little stressed because of this traffic, so I’m going to take a deep breath and listen to some calming music." This shows children that they, too, can manage their emotions in a healthy way.

4. Encourage Problem-Solving

Instead of immediately fixing a problem for a child, guide them through possible solutions. For example, if they are anxious about speaking in front of the class, ask, "What’s one small thing we could do to help you feel more comfortable?" This builds resilience and confidence over time.

You can also use storytelling to teach problem-solving. Read books where characters face challenges and discuss the solutions they used. Ask questions like, "What do you think the character should do?" or "Have you ever felt this way?"

5. Create a Calming Environment

A predictable and structured environment can provide security for an anxious child. Routines help children know what to expect, while quiet spaces where they can relax can give them a sense of control over their emotions.

One strategy is to create a "calm-down corner" with soft pillows, stuffed animals, and sensory tools like stress balls or fidget toys. When a child feels overwhelmed, they can go to this space to take a break and self-regulate.

When to Seek Extra Mental Health Support

While many children experience anxiety, there are times when professional support is necessary. If your child’s worries are significantly interfering with their daily life, it may be time to seek help from a licensed therapist. Consider reaching out if:

• Your child’s anxiety is preventing them from attending school or daycare

• They are withdrawing from activities and relationships they once enjoyed

• Their sleep is consistently disrupted due to anxiety or fear

• They engage in self-harming behaviors or express thoughts of wanting to disappear

• Their worries seem excessive and do not ease with reassurance or time

If, for example, a child refuses to go to school for weeks due to separation anxiety, or if they experience intense panic attacks before social events, these may be signs that professional intervention is needed.

Conclusion

Love is at the heart of helping children feel emotionally secure. By recognizing signs of childhood anxiety and providing support through validation, emotional education, and problem-solving strategies, we help children build confidence in their ability to manage big emotions. And when extra support is needed, seeking professional guidance can be an invaluable step toward ensuring your child’s well-being. Every child deserves to feel safe, understood, and loved—not just in February, but every day of the year.

By taking these steps, we create a world where children feel supported in their emotional growth, learning that it’s okay to feel big emotions and that they have the tools to work through them with the help of loving caregivers

Katlyn Gotschall, LCPC

Katlyn is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor (LCPC) and the founder of Apricity Counseling LLC. With a bachelor’s degree in Human Services and a master’s in Clinical Rehabilitation and Mental Health Counseling, Katlyn brings nearly eight years of experience in mental health settings to her practice.

Katlyn is dedicated to helping clients navigate stress, anxiety, grief, depression, and life transitions. She also supports individuals facing trauma, postpartum challenges, self-esteem concerns, and compassion fatigue. Inspired by the meaning of "apricity"—the warmth of the sun on a winter day—her practice reflects her commitment to providing a safe, welcoming environment for healing and growth.

Currently offering telehealth services with a sliding scale and most insurances accepted, Katlyn looks forward to expanding to in-person care in the future. She also integrates Christian-based therapy when appropriate, tailoring her approach to meet the unique needs of each client.

Outside of her career, Katlyn cherishes her roles as a wife and mother. She enjoys traveling, engaging with her community, and savoring her favorite obsession—coffee. Guided by the words of John A. Shedd, "A ship in a harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for," Katlyn believes therapy isn’t easy, but it's a tool provided to make challenges feel less lonely.